I have put this post off most of the day best I feel the subject “something treasured” just lends itself to being materialistic and I do not want to place monetary value or “rank” my possessions. Yes I could go on all day about the stuff I have and how much I feel it makes my life better, but in reality “stuff” is not what matters. Don’t get me wrong I love stuff and I’m in a constant struggle between obtaining more and then getting rid of it. It feels suffocating at times to be surrounded by some much stuff that is completely unnecessary. Case in point…when Austin and I found out we were expecting he immediately starts making a list of everything our little person will need. My response…nope this house is full already, an infant doesn’t know what a toy is (they’ll just play with the box anyway), and since we’ve moved we have this thing called outside with plenty of sticks, bugs, and hills to climb.
However, the best part of Austin’s want to run to the toy aisle is his excitement about becoming a Dad. We met working together at a school for boys with disabilities. I had absolutely no idea what I’d gotten myself into but, it was clear to see that even in this difficult situation he was able to maintain order without losing his cool (most days) and genuinely cared about the boys. I don’t know how many times I watched him interact with the boys throughout the day without a care in the world (thinking no one was watching). But when the time called for it he had the “Dad voice” down. So even before we were “us” I knew this guy was going to make someone a great Dad one day.
Then we became us and one late night conversation about baby names confirmed my long thought suspension that he indeed wanted to be a Dad. We continued along, my mind started wondering what it would be like to “start over” again with a brand new little one, we hit a rough patch, and I think I tried to cover up baby fever with puppy fever. I honestly never dreamed I’d be going down this road again but the fact I want to see Austin be a Dad, to see this 6’ tall guy holding a little tiny baby for the first time, watch him experience all the things that are to come with raising a little person….yes I’m that selfish and I want to be the one to give him this experience and witness all of it firsthand.
So this new adventure we are about to embark upon is something that I know I will treasure forever. I have memories already and we’re only 13 weeks in; watching Austin’s face when he saw the ultrasound, telling his parents, both of us nervous about telling my parents, seeing Mary’s reaction when we told the kids, hearing his grandmother’s disapproval at his choice of a name for a boy (possibly the best memory yet). No, not every aspect of this situation is perfect, but is there ever an ideal situation for every circumstance? I’d have to say there are very few situations which work out entirely perfect every time.
This next stage of our life together is something I already treasure and we haven’t even really begun the journey yet.